Call that creativity?

I'm annoyed by petty things, two petty things to be precise. The signs at either end of one of my favourite town. Hebden Bridge.



So FIVE HUNDRED years of fine-tuning creativity and they can't even come up with a design for a sign which fits the words on it?? I've probably missed the point here, but it's a good job I keep on failing my driving test because I'd probably ram this sign because it annoys me so much.

And where is the hyphen? Would it have cost that much more? Was that when they ran out of budget?

Grrrr....

And then I've just about calmed down when I get presented with this one leaving the town:



Boasting five hundred years of creativity and they not only come up with a sign which doesn't fit all the words on, but to top it off they waste money on a sign which just ruins any kind of enjoyment you might have had going through a nice country town, unspoiled by the ugliness of modernisation and a town which has refused to jump on so many distasteful bandwagons.

I'm going to go back in the middle of the night and write "Like, totally LOL" on the bottom, see how they like that!

Grumble grumble...

Get your Roxxx off ...

OH MY GOD. This is not real surely? The "Roxxxy" Sexbot.



"She" is a life-size robot, which you can customise with different looks, boob-size and personalities. You can opt for Frigid Farrah, Wild Wendy or probably flaming S&M Susan or something.

But don't go thinking that it's just a sex toy for the rich or a very expensive stag party accessory. Oh No! She has a personality you know. She's a life companion, according to the makers.

OH COME ON!! I probably don't need to say any more. Do I? You're all intelligent people aren't you? Ah, but I can't help ranting on about it... here goes...

She has a personality, she can hear you and respond to you. Except she can only respond with the things which you'd already programmed her to say, so where's the reality in that?
"We are trying to replicate a personality of a person." so say the makers. You can't program a personality, she's just a glorified washing machine with boobs and a sluttish dress sense, that doesn't amount to personality.

She's "anatomically-correct" with a mechanical heart that powers a liquid cooling system.(so she is a sex toy then? self-cooling huh??) and she has an articulated skeleton that can move like a person but cannot walk or independently move its limbs. So she's not like a real girlfriend at all then, because she has no free will and won't ever argue and will do exactly what you want, say what you want and can't go anywhere.

Apparently the makers see her as a companion for people who are not confident enough with girls. Yes well I can see how the experience of being with a robot will really help them to be able to talk to real girls when they finally get out more. Yes boys, girls will really do exactly what you say and think exactly what you want them to think. Plus they won't be freaked out at all by the other girlfriend you have stowed in the wardrobe.

God I'm almost feeling outraged enough to start a robot rights movement!

Also, don't these nerds learn anything from the lessons which sci-fi has taught them? That sexy lady Terminator was really mean and Buffy the Vampire Slayer completely kicked the arses of anyone who made a sexbot on her patch. They'd better watch out!

Ha, but don't worry ladies can get in on the act too, a male sex robot named Rocky is in development...



For full details = http://www.technewsworld.com/story/Roxxxy-Sexbot-Its-Not-Her-Looks-Its-Her-Personalities-69076.html?wlc=1263465089

Hey followers...

Oh blimey, I have some followers. Does that mean I have to do anything special? Clever? Meaningful?

I hope not.

I might have a little rant. On occasion.

Will that do?

Driving Me (Nat Geo) Wild

I think I've become intolerant and grumpy, but the name of this new satellite channel really did literally drive me mad. For at least a whole minute.


National Geographic is a legend, a cornerstone of wildlife photography, a treasure trove of geographical information, and something we probably all remember seeing about the house in our youth (when people still bothered with actual magazines in print). My grandfather had a massive collection, years and years worth, neatly shelved and sacred.

So it really annoyed me that they've reduced it to fawn to the idiots who can't seem to cope with full words. Everything has to be reduced, dumbed down. People can't cope with thinking for the span of whole words any more, no, they need things shorter and shorter. And it makes it seem fun and wacky, missing the end off words, doesn't it?

Here's a picture of a pissed off penguin in socks, just to get in on the act of dumbing down the natural world:



... and another thing (she says ramming her finger into the desk in anger)... I've remembered now what it was that set me off in the first place.

The Dog Whisperer.

Cesar somebody-or-other. He's even named after a dog food. If you've seen it you don't need me to go on to explain it. If you haven't then it's probably important viewing for people who have unruly pets, who don't deserve to have pets because they think they are ornaments and not living things which need care and attention and discipline to function. Like the woman called Kitten who dyed her dog pink to match her decor and then wondered why the thing was pissed off:



Do I need to go on?... grr... grumble...

.

A load of Wii

OH MY GOD. I don't have words to describe how hideous this is!



(Bring your baby to life with the remote control)


I don't know what will freak the kids out more, the fact that real babies don't just hook up to a games console to stop them crying, or the sight of their precious babies being used vigorously as tennis rackets or lightsabres by drunken parents...

.

Having my cake and eating it...

I hear that phrase time and time again, that you can't have your cake and eat it... why not? It's my cake!!

Why would I buy cake to just look at it? Am I allowed to eat it if it's about to go off or do I have to watch it go mouldy? Can I just sniff it a bit and imagine I'm eating it?

The phrase is supposed to suggest that you can't have too many good things in life, you have to choose between owning the cake or eating the cake. If we boil this down still further (eurgh - boiled cake!), I think what it's getting at really is that you should only eat cake you don't "have".

So I basically need someone to feed me stolen cakes. Any offers?

You can start by stealing this fine Tom Selleck cake from someone called Emma...




(Pic from www.seriouseats.com)

Do you believe in fairy's ???

No I don't!

I believe in FAIRIES.

I also believe in the benefits of checking the spelling on things before I sell them. Admittedly babies probably don't read what's on their nightwear, but parents do.

Shocking.


Yes, we should all support disability equality, but does that extend to those with the inability to use proper words?

Probably it does.

Well it does if you work for the Voluntary Arts Organisation anyway...

.